Friday, September 14, 2007

In which we find our heroine somewhere in the middle of a new begining...

The best of intentions.... I was suprised to see that the last time I posted was August 2. Where has the time gone? Late summer/early fall is a busy time of year for me.... and now September is halfway over. Things are settling down some, which is good.

I am still feeling pretty good, although having ups and downs. But the big news, is that I went out and got myself a new sponsor. I had finished step 12 with my old sponsor, and since step 9 had still been in the food. I looked to an online e-mail list for a sponsor, and I found one that is in a time zone an hour earlier than mine. In working with this sponsor, I have been abstinent since 9/5/07 -- thats 10 days! Woo hoo! This is a risky time for me, I am always a chronic relapser around 2 weeks. One day at a time, one day at a time....

I had a food dream last night. I dreamt that I went to a carnival and ate all that carnival food -- candy apples, fried dough, etc. etc. and then at the end of the day at the carnival, I realized that I had wanted to try to stick to a food plan, and forgot about it, and had broken my abstinence. I woke up in the morning feeling as guilty as if I had actually eaten the food.

Soon I will start working on Step 1 with my new sponsor. I'll try not to be so much of a stranger...

P.S. If you are a COE or Food Addict with a blog, let me know and I will post the link in the sidebar.

3 comments:

Dodi said...

You had a using dream. I'm told they are common with addicts. I've had a couple where the dream felt so real I was depressed all day. I felt awful that I had broken my abstinence until I reminded myself it was just a dream. Then I would forget again and get miserable thinking that I've thrown away my abstinence and how would I ever get out of relapse.

Once I heard that these dreams are common among sober alcoholics and drug users I felt better. Like I must be doing something right.

Congratulations on finding a new sponsor and committing to working the steps again.

Belema said...

I found ur blog while looking for OA blogs ....nice thanks !!

Sharon from the Valley said...

great blog!

hey there...check out my blog. i am struggling with weight loss and have detailed my story and some of my conclusions...